Southern Pines, North Carolina resident Isabel Coles has opened up about the grief she went through after her husband, Christopher, committed himself a day after they returned from their honeymoon.
Last September, the couple, who had started dating a year and a half earlier after meeting on a dating app, got married. They had a beautiful honeymoon celebration at a New Jersey beachside music festival to commemorate their nuptials.
Shortly after returning home, Christopher—an active-duty member of the military—was preparing for a larger wedding celebration planned for May, updating guest lists and finalizing details. But the next morning, he left their home and walked into the woods. Isabel, sensing something was wrong, tried to stop him, but he wouldn’t listen. She later discovered he had taken his handgun with him.
Panicked, Isabel contacted his parents, who flew in from Georgia to help search for him. Tragically, Christopher’s body was found the next morning, on September 18, by his father.
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In the wake of his death, Isabel has wrestled with grief and confusion, questioning whether there were signs she might have missed. “He was very driven and motivated,” she said. “I was shocked, I was devastated. He was great during our honeymoon—we had a wonderful time.”
She described Christopher as someone who was incredibly hard on himself, constantly pushing to be better. “There were no signs,” she said. “It really took me off guard.”
In the days that followed, Isabel received an outpouring of support, with people commenting on how happy the couple looked together. “After he passed, I got an overwhelming amount of messages from people saying we looked so happy and that they always wanted what we had,” she shared.
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Months later, Isabel experienced a bittersweet moment when she received a bouquet of flowers from Christopher. Initially startled, she learned he had scheduled the delivery in advance for their first Valentine’s Day together, knowing he would be deployed at the time.
While Isabel’s story has touched many, it has also drawn some criticism from people online who have unfairly blamed her for Christopher’s death. “There are people in my life who say I had something to do with it,” she said. “I know it’s not true. My husband and I were very happy. No one can change that or take that away from me.”
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Though she still struggles with feelings of guilt, Isabel believes her husband had been silently battling deep internal struggles. “I don’t think we were unhappy, and I don’t believe I caused it. He was clearly fighting demons no one knew about,” she said. “I’m not doing well; a part of me is gone forever.”
She emphasized that she doesn’t believe he acted out of malice. “I know he didn’t do it to hurt me,” Isabel said. “For whatever reason, he probably thought people would be better off without him.”
If you or someone you know is struggling, help is available. You can contact a mental health professional or reach out to suicide prevention resources for support.
